His arms are my arms....

Dear ?.....
    I have not felt close to God for a long time. Something was missing I found myself empty and lonely. I really had no idea what was wrong. I was aimless as a mother, and my discipline of my children was inconsitent and fraught with anger. My household management was wanting. In the past, my husband and I have had a good relationship, but even that was limp. I often cry myself to sleep, not knowing what was wrong.
   My husband had been attempting to get intimate with me during "that time of the month" at which I usually pushed him away, He knew it was "that time", but assured me, he only wanted to give me pleasure...
   I guess I must think in boxes; it is either all or nothing for me. And so, when I did not think it was all a good time, then it was nothing. Last night, after I resisted my husband yet again(argh!), my heart cried out to God, and I began to cry and cry and pray. Eventually the sobbing subsided, and I calmed down(my DH had sleepily held onto me and let me cry it out).    It was then I felt like God said in that still small voice, "Those arms that hold you are my arms", I felt the warmth and strength of my husbands arms about me. I realized by pushing my husband away, I am pushing God away. NO WONDER I was sooo very lonely!!!  I have been pushing the Lord away all this time and refusing to receive guidence and comfort  here on earth ,from my Saviour...
   How eagerly I went to myhusband and how eager I will always reamain! Life is an education. Boxes, boundaries, self imposed rules, they are all the same ink.
   Today was like a new day! My children, my house, my chores, I saw everything with different eyes, THANKFUL eyes, a grateful heart and a soul full of  joy and love....
  
 "A wise woman guages her husbands needs. She seeks to fulfill his desire before even he is aware fo them. She never leaves him daydreaming outside of home. She supplies his desire."

   Ladies, as the time draws close to Our Heavenly Saviour coming, the enemy of our souls will pour it on even more...WE NEEDS to fall on our faces before our Father and ask for guidence, Help, truth, and  our hearts to be changed....not to stay in the same mold, as we always have...
    Pray, as we never have before...for us to HEAR His still small voice, to determine, in our hearts to do the will of the Father..not our own wills....hard?, you think, yes, it is, but, the joys that will flood or souls when we do.... 
   More later....

   Love to all who read.....
   !~~~TERRI~~~!